I was swinging at a playground. The only color I saw was that of the yellow seat of the swing. On one side of the swing God stood. His arms were stretched out to me but I couldn’t totally see him. On the other side of the swing stood tall all that I had been putting my hope and time and pleasure in. That- I could see clearly. I sat on the swing moving back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, between what I wanted and felt like I needed to then what I actually needed and knew deep down in my heart that I desired and longed for.
Jesus whispered. . .
“Come to me my child. Jump!”
“But I can’t Daddy. I don’t know how.”
“Just jump! I will catch you.”
~About three weeks later~
“Kylie, I see you swinging. You’re swinging in a field of flowers. It’s just you and Jesus. You’re on a rope swing. And Kylie, I feel like Jesus is saying to you, “I am enjoying spending time with you.” And Kylie, you are happy.”
I had to jump. God has been revealing to me in the past few weeks that He has been longing to be with me. I haven’t been taking time for Him. That breaks His heart. And you know what? My heart has been breaking because of it too.
He has continued to just tell me to TRUST Him. But of course, in the beginning, the questioning began, “But what does that look like? I don’t know how. Is that really what’s best? Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”
His answer, “Trust. Trust me by thanking me for each day as it comes. Thank me in the little things. Thank me when you feel like the day couldn’t get any worse. Trust me when you’re heart is breaking. You know in your heart that I know what’s best and that My plans are better for you than you could ever ask for or imagine. Just come to me,my beloved.”
His words were not harsh. There was no condemnation, no angry sound, no disgusted “here we go again” sort of feel to them.
Only Grace and Love.
I am learning.
Learning what it really means to trust Him, to trust Him enough to be weak. Because it’s o.k. to be weak. It’s o.k. to not have it all together or look like you have it all together. It’s o.k. to lie your head on the pillow at night after having been crying for the last half hour and to wake up and cry in the morning as well. It’s o.k. to not be normal…When people ask how you’re doing you are honest. It’s o.k. to not be o.k. Because you know what?
He will sustain you. . . Isaiah 46:4- “I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.”
He will give you rest . . . Matthew 11:28- “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
His mercies are new every morning. . . Lamentations 3:22-24- The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail. They are new every morning. Great is Your faithfulness.The Lord is my portion, says my soul,Therefore I have hope in Him.The Lord is good to those who wait for Him,To the person who seeks Him.
He takes great delight in you… Luke 3:22- and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form like a dove. And a voice came from heaven: “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.”
And He is calling you His beloved. He is longing to be with you. . . Song of Solomon 6:3- “I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine; he browses among the lilies.
His promises are filled with Truth. And oh how special and heart-warming that is.